My week in a nutshell.
Friday – Boring. Pliss to ignore.
Saturday – Happy lunch with the remnants of The Fellowship. Project Shoot Krishna initiated. Flew across room with help from a velociraptor. Or a V for Vendetta Natalie Portman lookalike. You pick. I wouldn’t advise the same methods if you desire to be airborne though. You’re better off here .
Sunday – Boring. Skip over.
Monday – The bacchu’s birthday. General happiness that quickly turned into boredom which turned into general panic.

Sleeplessness has set in yet again. Its been killing me for over a week. Hence -

10 Things to do When The World is Sleeping and You are Not.

• Watch spider eggs hatch on youtube. Here.
• Practice your banshee-impersonation skills atop your roof. Never mind the uncle from the opposite flat who appears to be aiming that large metal thing in your direction.
• Test the strength of a tomato by jumping on it with a pogo stick.
• Wait at the window for your beloved MooCow to arrive strum away at its guitar, singing ‘Let’s Go Out To The Moooooovies’.
• Hide in your neighbourhood garbage dump. Leap and screech at the unsuspecting rats and stray puppies wandering by, brandishing a banana peel.
  Pray that these unsuspecting rats and stray puppies have not watched Monty Python’s Flying Circus.
• Call Aunty Mildred. Share the pain.
• Attempt to not think of koalas.
• Urge the dead flowers in your room to bloom once again by singing appropriate songs to them. Profess surprise when the glass vase holding them shatters.
• Creep into aforementioned uncle’s house and see how much of his ear-hair you can pull out before dying an extremely painful death.
• Contemplate studying for your finals which are, in all likelihood, tomorrow.

A smarter plan, however, would probably be to sleep – else you’ll turn into a zombie like I have.

Ooh, and lookie us!

SO now, you may wait with bated breath for the screening.

I have a splitting headache, so I’m going to scat for now. My thermodynamics textbook glowers at me.

Sigh.

Gaya

A year is a fairly long time.

Here’s what’s changed:

• AIESEC, it has now taken over a fair portion of my life. In a nice way, mind you.
• College – 1 year to graduation, WAHAHAHAAAA! and er..
• Me – I’m a year older, I’ve clearly turned intellectual and have gotten muscle-ier. Ha. Ignore the mere mortals who squish my arm and snort about ‘chappati maavu!’, they’re clearly delusional idiots.

Some things never change.

• Here I am, blogging in the time I should be studying for my Physics practical exam finals. They’re tomorrow. :/
• Study holidays are, once again, proving to be movie marathon time.
• Appreciable vertical growth is still something I can’t boast of.
• Summer has officially begun. Yay and ARGHHH, for different reasons.
• My love for Moo Cows.

I followed one down a road last week. It didn’t seem to like me much though. Pitiful. I therefore meandered into the nearest air-conditioned store and proceeded to seem ridiculously fascinated by the toothbrushes near a vent to save myself before I melted into a squidgepuddle.

• My supreme morning grouchiness.

While hunting for the paper for my dad this morning, I was greeted by neighbour-child’s telly blaring a nursery rhyme video tape that was going

‘This is the way we go to school go to school, go to school (x2)
Early in the morningggg.’

..and so on, punctuated by her either screeching bloody murder or singing  to it. I would obviously have loved to sing along if hadn’t been mentally picturing her pinned to a wall by a spear. Ah well, such is life. When I grow up I shall have children named Tweedledum and Tweedledee I shall have goldfish named Tweedledum and Tweedledee.

• My dislike for pigeons -

which my mother now shares, except in a bit of a maniacally nutter way. Why? Because they dare tresspass upon her oh-so-preshus plants and nibble at the grass she’s been trying to grow on the window ledge since, umm, forever. Because they sneak clandestinely into shoe cupboards and build nests in our sneakers…and are thus clearly violations of all things permissible. This resulted in a fair amount of entertainment for the rest of us, anyway. She drew inspiration from this chap and decided that her ultimate aim in life was to impale the aforementioned birds. How? By embedding tableforks in the grass. Woe, they didn’t fall for it. Hence, mator dearest hatched a magnificent new plan – and thus Operation Disguise Tableforks as Pigeons began. Again, how? Cover tableforks with grey socks and paint on eyes and beaks - ingenious, oui? Surprise! – not. She therefore went back to the old standby, and flew into fits of rage in which she threw stationary or worse from her table out the balcony at them. We live on the 8th floor; I don’t want to know what happened to the poor creatures who wander about our building. The pigeons, however, are thriving, thank you very much. We also think she has potential to be a knife thrower. Not the kind that throws knives at the circus, but the maniac kind. Hoohoo. Naw, it isn’t as bad as it sounds.

I’m really not much better.

When I was 8, I was amazed by ice. Especially the sort that used to matierialise at the back of my then non-frost-free refrigerator. This amazement then turned to amusement when my friend Anirudh and I discovered that we could scrape off this ice, charge to the balcony and catapult bits of it at the people below. We really did think we were doing everyone a favour, making it snow and all. The aunties downstairs didn’t agree though. Neither did the house next door. They also made special effort to make sure we understood this.  Kill-joys. We were then forced to turn to more boring things, like soap bubbles and imaginary missiles. Thus, we arrive at the birth of my anti-social tendencies. We’re pretty happy together, these tendencies and I. 
I have been inspired to create my next comprehensive list. Wait with bated breath, it comes, shortly shortly. My oh-so-kick-ass illustration process is underway.

Ah, and here are ickle bits of life.

This off Vatsa’s blog -here- coz I haven’t taken the lot from Sofie yet. Cast & Crew of Karma, a short film that Amith wrote & directed

 
This is Milka, my cow. She squirts multicoloured milk and carries my crayons.

Early morning beaching last week.

Oh, and I got my name analysed here.
Your first name of Gayatri has given you a friendly, likeable nature, and you could excel in artistic and musical expression. Your emotional feelings are easily aroused and you will always be involved in other people’s problems as a result of your overly sympathetic nature. You have many disappointments because of extending a helping hand to others in need, and then not receiving any acknowledgement or reciprocation for your generosity. After each experience, you have to guard against feelings of despondency and self-pity. You have high goals and ideals, but must incorporate more practicality, system, and concentration in order to materialize them.

So now I shall exhibit my overly sympathetic nature and sob hysterically for all your souls while wallowing in self-pity. Or perhaps I shall attempt to study in the hope that I may do something in life besides improve alien bumsuits. Krkr to you until next time.

Gaya 

Back from hibernation! Missed me much? Probably not, but here I am, back to plague you again. Much has happened since I last posted, shan’t go into icky details though.In short, last summer was incredible; our unofficial D.E.A.S. trip rocked, med school was not for me (the other way around, actually), my favourite person moved out of the country, I turned 18 & almost married Samyuktha. Ah, and college, yes. That happened too.

In mid-June, I decided to get off my fat arse.. and entered the portals of Stella Maris to major in Chem, hee.

I have learnt many things from this marvelous institution. We shall not go into how many of these things are academic.

• An ocean of females is extremely frightening. This ocean is what whacks you in the face when you walk into Stella for the first time. The ones that are perpetually giggling and sending ‘I-know-something-you-don’t’ looks at innocent mortals walking around cause the most mental infliction. Running away does not help; females, they’re everywhere! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

• It gets better, though. Much better.

• There are loadsa people shorter than I am. Seriously. Hey, I might even push it and classify myself into the ‘average height category.

• Crows are infinitely evil creatures. Even more evil than pigeons, and that.. is saying something.

• Because of the aforementioned creatures, it is advisable to sit at the canteen area with an umbrella. Unless you envy my predicament. Also, never choose to gape at the sky while sitting under their oh-so-beautiful trees; this one needn’t be tested.

• In some places, an appreciation society for socks is perfectly acceptable.

• The library is a happy place.

• All seniors are not Cruella de Vils, they’re kickarse.

• Some of the above even do Victory Bum Dances. All Hail!

• Seeing wastepaper baskets on fire is a common occurance in Stella Chem Labs.

• College plays rule all.

• There might be something between my ears, after all. Besides rocks and cobwebs.

• I might even be losing my anti-social tendencies, just a bit. I don’t find it wierd to say hey to random people anymore. Joy!

• Some people understand when you go ‘ting!’

• Classes can be good fun when there is no Physics in your syllabus. BWAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHA. Well, not until next semester, atleast. *sigh*

• Sanskrit. That which sapped life of happiness for 7 long years. That which most of us (the ones with sense) screeched about.That which we thought had ended with the 10th grade.

Well, SURPRISE! It’s back, and worse than ever. More on that later, wait with bated breath.

Now finals are done. I’ve survived 2 semsters, 1/3rd of my course, quite happily. And I’m home. For another two weeks anyway.. Yay! Ah, and yes, AIESEC happened too. I’m now a proud member of the TN department, the 9 of us call ourselves ‘The Fellowship’. What’s not to love?

I have taken to beginning my wonderful and oh-so-eventful mornings by broadening my horizons and intellect by watching ‘PlaySchool’ on the Australia Network; a delightful, bright and awe-inspiring show for toddlers. Charming, really.

‘Three little sausages, sitting in a pan.
One went POP, and then went BANG.
Only two little sausages sitting in a pan.
Two little sausages, sitting in a pan.
One went POP, the other went BANG.
No little sausages sitting in the pan.’

Poor phachacked sausages. The ideas they put into children’s heads these days.

And hey, since when has Humpty Dumpty texted his minions to invite them to tea parties? Gone are the days when all he did was fall off his stupid wall. Ah well. I have also spent large spans of time dreaming about when I own an octopus, which I will name Augustus Gloop, and nickname Gloopy.

Such is life. At the rate I’m going, my little sister’s going to be doing a PhD in Astrophysics while I sit open-mouthed, watching Barney the Dinosaur.

On the brighter side, I’m one among 10 who’ve been picked for a research scholarship to the IISc, Bangalore and will probably spend a month and a half every summer there for the next three years. I leave on the 11th of May. Wheee!

Here’s my inbox’s contribution for the day..

–

Traditional Economics
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You retire on the income.

Indian Economics
You have two cows.
You worship them.

Pakistani Economics
You don’t have any cows.
You claim that the Indian cows belong to you.
You ask the US for financial aid, China for military aid, British for Warplanes, Italy for machines, Germany for technology, French for submarines, Switzerland for loans, Russia for drugs and Japan for equipment. You buy the cows with all this and claim exploitation by the world.

American Economics
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You profess surprise when the cow drops dead.

French Economics
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.

German Economics
You have two cows.
You reengineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.

British Economics
You have two cows.
They are both mad cows.

Italian Economics
You have two cows.
You don’t know where they are. You break for lunch.

Swiss Economics
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.

Japanese Economics
You have two cows.
You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cute cartoon cow images called Cowkimon and market them worldwide.

Chinese Economics
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.

Russian Economics
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 17 cows.
You give up counting and open another bottle of vodka.
—-

That’s it for now, shall bore you later. Until then, may your pockets overflow with the somber smudge turgescing from the wart holes of a Schnigerian Noseleech. Mweeeeeesh. That doesn’t even mean anything. Ta!

Gaya

…yeah, I’m in the mood to rant. In the interest of both your patience and sanity, I shall spare you the torture. However, I see fit to subject you to to a little of the rubbish I’ve discovered over the past few weeks.

• A ‘ting‘ is a person who never swears. Seriously.
• The beach looks so much better when you’re looking at it from inside an air-conditioned car at 1 in the afternoon.
• The probability of me following study timetables is directly proportional to that of me sprouting into a 10 foot tree.
• If you were to run around town screeching ‘I love ding-dings!’, you would be proclaiming your love for ancient three legged Chinese vessels.
• Finding cobwebs in your cupboard is definitely not a good sign.
• Pomeranians are ANNOYING.
• Writing an exam becomes not-so-nice when the ceiling of the room you are in decides to shower you periodically with paint, sand (?) and god knows what else.
• The thought of what could happen to the dunderhead sitting in front of you with his mouth open, staring at the ceiling could give you some amount of sadistic joy.
• The phrase ‘Nahinnnn, bachaoo!!’ is of great use when you have nothing better to say and want to sound intellectual. Well, maybe not. But emphasis works.
• It is impossible to walk around a room tryig to study while trying to carry a guide that, in all, probably weighs more than you do. And you thought the NCERT textbooks were heavy.
• Sour gummy whatchamacallits rock!

With that, I shall have to leave you for now. I need to get into college and my rank at VIT isn’t exactly reassuring me. Bbye.

Gaya

Well, now you do.

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can’t replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you’re too in love to let it go
But if you never try you’ll never know
Just watch and learn

Lights will guide your home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream, down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I..

Tears stream, down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I..

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.

- Coldplay (Fix You)

I’ve fallen in love with Chris Martin’s voice all over again.

Excerpts; they’re all from different people.

Std 6 :

Name & Address : Great Devil, Hehe

Happiest Moment : Every day I am a Devil! [Tis besides the point that I was the Little Devil, but yeah...]

You look best in : My disco clothes. (Yes, the life of a 6th grader)

Std 8 :

Your Thoughts About Me : gavitri is wacko, gaay is gaayu.

‘Lines For You : _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ (i.e. draws lines) Is that enough?

The One Thing Missing In My Life : The ability to shut you up *sigh* (hmph, and these are the morons I call my best friends)

You foof those candles : (Writes date) And when electricity comes back after power cut…

Std 10 :

Zodiac Sign : Pisces! (draws fish) Kissing fish especially for you gaay.

Fruit / Veggie You Resemble : I hate fruits!! Yuck yuck n if i was a veggie people would jsut eat me up. (yeah, we sit & puja punnify for the fruits, right? (^_^) )

I like you coz you are : You!! I love you gaay! (draws 7 hearts, 7 kissy faces… 1 for every day of the week?)

Date : Gaay… I thot you were straight.. Anyway, I am… so… I’m sorry. (*rolls eyes*)

—
If you look carefully, you’ll see the evolution of the Great Devil into a self-confessed fruit phobic kissing fish. Hmmm. God knows what I’m in store for this year. The fact that I write absolutely unintelligible rubbish in other people’s slambooks is a trivial, and may be ignored.

And no, I don’t need a slambook to remember people… I couldn’t forget your mugs if I wanted to. *sighs*

The point of this post was to let you know that you’ve got to fill mine up. Then when we’re 70 I’ll write a comparative analysis on the evolution of your brain & you can feel all special. Wheeeee. =)

And Nandita just forwarded me a text message for the second time today (emphasis?) saying that says multiplying the last digit of your mobile phone’s number with 2, adding 5 and multiplying that by 50, adding your age, and then adding 365 and then subtracting 615 gives you a 3 digit number; the last two of which are your age and the first happens to be your cell’s last number. Don’t ask me for fundas behind it, I’m just your average mentally & vertically challenged child; it appears to work though, so try it if you’re jobless.

So much for a post, I’ll be back when I find something remotely intelligent to say.

Gaya

P.S. And if you’re part of P.S.B.B. 2005-2006 Std 12 batch go sign up at The Forum!
P.P.S. And no, you’re not neanderthals.

I have also spent an appreciable amount of time trying to expand my horizons by watching extra intellectual stuff.

Eggbert : Why, Oswald, you have your hands full!
Oswald : Yes, these are for Henry, he has the sniffles. They’re to make him feel better.
Eggbert : Then you must keep his nose happy! Here, a whole box of happy hankies!
Leo : Yes, yes, give these to Henry with our best wishes!
Oswald : Thank you! Goodbye!

Hooray for Oswald the Octapus and Spongebob Squarepants and all their tribe. Whee. Now all I need in life are happy hankies.

Anyway, I’ve got to scat now, need to study Physics to pass on Monday. Bleargh. Will post later tonight if possible, tata!

Gaya